Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Deflated


Donating blood is good for you (and others).
Cross country skiing is good for you.
Donating blood and then cross country skiing isn't good for you.  In fact I have first hand experience it will leave you like a deflated balloon on the side of the trail if you try it.

Friday I donated blood. I try to do so every 56 or so days.
It's my attempt to drop weight. 
No, seriously. 
No, seriously it's good to donate your blood.  You should do it too.

The entire process doesn't take that long.  I'm usually in and out within 45 minutes or so, with most of the time going through procedural stuff: paper work, check your iron levels, personal info, have you been sick recently, dental work in the past week or so, tattoos in the past six months, had sex with someone who has lived in Africa and worked with feces throwing monkeys, etc.  Pretty standard stuff.

I can fill the 450 ml (1 pint) bag in under 4.5 minutes.   The bag always looks bigger - like the size of a milk bag (do the Yanks buy their milk in bags?).  They pulled the needle out of my arm at 5:55 PM. "Plenty of fluids, rest and no heavy lifting or exercise." Sure, sure - no problem.

Pffffttt . . . they only mean that for the weak and crippled. Surely an exquisite athletic specimen such as myself should have no problem going for a 2 hour night ski.
  • 8:00 PM - Curvy Butt and I are on the way into the Gats.
  • 8:30 PM'ish - skis on, at the trailhead, we begin
  • 8:35 PM - "Why the f*ck is Mark going sooo f*cking fast!?! F*cker!" I feel like I'm dying.
  • 8:50 PM - I need to lay down on the trail in the snow. Head spinning.
  • 8:55 PM - My second lay down.  Head feels like it's fallen off my body and rolling down the hill I just slowly skied up.
  • 9:05 PM - I pull the plug and begin heading back to the car alone, sure that the coyotes will sense that there's prey close-at-paw, wounded - an easy and rather large all you can eat buffet.  Curvy Butt plods along without me.
 I've don't think I've ever *really* exercised after donating before.  I've been donating since my mid-20's and have never felt weak, ill or nauseous.  But man-o-man . . . this time left me completely wiped out.

I know how having 450 ml taken out affects you.  I wonder how having 450 ml of oxygen enriched blood put back in affects you

4 comments:

dave1949 said...

I made much the same mistake years ago, going out for a nice skating date after dropping the blood. All was well till the group we were with decided to play crack the whip and I got to pull the chain. About 30 secs into that I just slowly stopped skating and slumped to the ice out cold.
Everyone else thought I was just screwing around till I couldn't get back up.
Three minute later all was well again and all my friends to this day think the whole thing was hugely amusing.
Regardless the donation is a great idea and someone somewhere is thanking you today.

Anonymous said...

I use to give, but since having wild sex with people in Africa, I can not.

And, those damn green monkeys. I hate that long questionnaire.

the blood truck hasn't been at our work in about a year.

But, I did use to give.

Someone needs it. It could save a life!

Peter Keiller said...

I didn't just donate blood, I gave organs. Vital ones. Then finished Breck, broke...

Thad S. said...

We do not get milk in bags. We get it in plastic containers, like civilized people.