Packed

Just about ready to go. Getting the bike to fit in the bike box wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. Was a little worried because it's a 29'er, but it fit no problem. Just up to the airlines now not to crush it.

Notice the two saddles and two seat posts? Yep, one is Curvy Butt's who left his at home.

I had to make sure that everything I am taking fit into one bag and weighed less than 50lbs. Not an easy task. All the cycling clothing, nutrition, bike maintenance & back up parts, camp gear, toiletry stuff and civilian clothing to get me through seven days of racing.

Two pictures. Two differences.

Can you spot the two differences in the articles I am taking?

Winner will receive this as a prize. Hurry with your answers!

Sunday words

Rainy Sunday morning here in the nation's capital. It is supposed to clear up later today and I will hopefully jump on the road bike for a loop of the park. Got out yesterday. Legs didn't want to work for me at first, took a long time to get them moving. After about an hour, things came good. This tapering business leaves me wondering if it's right for me. I seem to ride stronger when I am riding lots and lots. If that's the case, I'll be fine after the first couple days while out in BC.

Good luck to all those racing at Albion Hills this weekend - Chico's 24 Hr Summer Solstice should be a good one this year (especially so if you're solo'ing). Rumor had it that there wasn't so much climbing this year, that they've added in some new trail and made it a little more technical. All the boys on the team should be flying. I checked the weather this morning for that area of Ontario and looks like they got some rain last night. Looking forward to hear the race reports from everyone who participated.

Finally got word directly from Niner who have given me the nod to ride the MCR, despite the crack. They figure it'll be fine (if it's not I'll be pissed!!) . Steel has a long fatigue life and should hold. They figure the crack was there either when it was built (that's some fine fabrication for you!) or that the seat tube collar was closed without the seat post being in. They're sending up a replacement frame in the meantime . . . . and told me it couldn't get here on time?! Ever hear of an overnight express delivery? Guess I am not that important! * SIGH*

Big THANK YOU to Misty and Vassago Cycles who were trying to hook me up with a Bandersnatch frame as a replacement (which they couldn't get to me as a shipment was running late, cause everyone is buying them up cause they're wicked bikes!). Which, by the way, may *possibly* become my long distance ride in the future . . . . more on that. (* some juggling of a new MCR Niner frame will have to take place first!) . I'd really like to be riding a blood red Bander as Vassago have been ubber cool with me and the geometry is bang on that of my Jabberwocky . . . making the transition to and from each bike easy peasy.

Last minute preparations are taking their toll on my sanity. I've got a million lists laying around the house of things to do and get before I head west. I don't want to forget anything . . . . like my race partner, Curvy Butt, who is already out west and sent me this e-mail this morning:

Yeah you're stupid (he's referring to my f*ck up with my airline reservation with Air Canada) but I've got you beat by miles. I arrived a few hours ago and built up my bike. Packing job worked awesome. Rotors are true, no damage, nice.

I did however leave my seat and seatpost clamped securely in my work stand at home!!!

Can you pick it up and bring it with you? I'm going to borrow one (or something) to get a ride in but really need my seat so I'm not bleeding from my balls at the end of day one.

Too much! This trip has already gotten interesting. I'll feel a whole lot better once I'm on that plane, cause after that, there's not much more I can do and hope that some of the stress I've been carrying will drop off like an old scab (there's some nice imagery for you!).

I came for big bums, but stayed for big ring

I got to find some humor in this cracked frame fiasco. So, this is all I got . . . more crack.

Do you know the number one thing on my blog that receives the most hits?
This image:


From my stats counter I can find out things, like where people come from, when, what page directed them, what search engines they used, how many people visited in one day, etc. - basic stats. And from all of those stats, this image gets the most hits.
WHY?

I really don't know.

I thought people came to my site for my cheery disposition, insight on life and biking, some daily reflection and wisdom, and my atrocious writing. Hell, this photo gets more hits than my naked reviews! You mean to tell me people want to see two huge over weight fat chicks in g-strings? (actually they're probably size XXL regular full back bathing suit bottoms)
I don't get it.

Serenity now!

T-minus eight days and counting . . . . and no word on my bike.
I knew a year ago at this point I would be under pressure getting prep'd for BC, just the logistics of it all is pretty huge: nutrition, travel, lodging before and after, gear lists, clothing options and so on. Add on top of all of that the STRESS of not knowing if I'm going to have to ride a cracked frame for a seven day stage race is almost too much.

Would you ride a cracked frame in a seven day stage race, that you've trained and invested time and money in, taking a chance on a year's worth of preparation only to have your bike possibly fail on you?

I didn't think so!

Bad Timing, Real Bad

Cleaning the Niner last night, getting it all prep'ed for BC - putting a new shifter cable on (it's 1x9 so I only need one), giving it a good clean and waxing (yep, I wax my bikes - helps keep the dirt off and makes it easier to clean later. Don't believe me - try it yourself). To my surprise I found this crack forming on the back side of the seat tube. It wasn't there the other day. How long will it take for 3mm to become an out of control crack? I don't know and don 't want to find out after I'm out in BC.

Hard to see the crack, but trust me - it's there!

A strange place to crack. If I had one race, one which I could bring a back up bike, I'd probably ride the Niner and deal with a warranty afterwards. Racing for seven stages, with huge mileage . . . . hmmmm, probably not a good idea. I've seen enough cracks in bikes to know how fast they can grow into huge problems.

I'd love to take the Jabberwocky, and even considered it. But it is totally unrealistic to ride single speed for seven days straight. I'd have to have a slew of rear cogs to match each stage, I know myself and I am a whimp - riding a geared 1x9 is going to be hard enough. It also wouldn't be fair to Curvy Butt who'd be waiting for me at the top of each climb as I hike-a-bike.

I'm hoping the boys at Tall Trees can sort this out with Niner and get me a replacement frame ASAP. It's too late in the game to be borrowing a bike (I fly out in 9 nine days!) , and most likely a 26'er (blah, phoooey, yuck) from someone. I want to ride what's comfortable and familiar - I wish I had a Bandersnatch (especially the new 'blood red' - beauty!) - it's the exact same geometry as the Jabber.

And to top it all off, the coffers are pretty much empty. This race and preparation for it has been more expensive than I could have imagined. To be honest, I'll be be scrapping by if I have to even pay for shipping of a new frame.

I've got hair to sell . . . .maybe that'll pay for it?!

7%

My helmet is a little looser now that the 'fro is gone.
Believe it or not, the new aerodynamic haircut has made me 7% faster.
Photo from yesterday's ride - report here (clicky, clicky)

Mmmmmmmmmullet

I cut my hair.

Hair today, gone tomorrow

Ever hear the expression, "The higher the hair, the closer to God"?

If that's true, I may nearly be a saint.

My hair has been on my mind lately (get it?? . . . .on my mind?! on my head!?! Oh man, I slay myself sometimes!). I've been growing it for over a year now, the longest I've ever grown it. And I've had a lot of fun with it. Another expression, have you heard it? "Where there's hair, there's fun!"

I've thought of perhaps using my new doo to help me break into the public broadcast service (PBS) painting circuit. I hear there's a lot of money to be made whipping out oil paintings of country scenes. Only problem is I don't have a soothing voice, patience to paint or the skills. Though I am a damn fine finger painter (a prerequisite to be a teacher!).

I hear this guy is a real ladies man!

Speaking of 'ladies man' . . . . every woman loves a big, thick, healthy mustache, right?!
I could grow a stash. The one above is courtesy of my dog Jacks. He had to be brushed and I had to have some fun. It was a win/win situation.
I think I'm a much more handsome version than Tom Selleck.

Yes, I'd agree, he's got a much more square jaw - but I make up for that with my squeezable pudginess.

barber shop doo? . . . . OR . . . . "Hi, I'm here to take your daughter to the prom."

side view - wicked aerodynamics

Flock of Seaguls? Depressed? Depressed because I look like a member of Flock of Seagulls?

Jacks digs my hair

I got to do something with this mop on top. The thought of racing out in BC for seven days with this thing on my head is way too much. I could always ask Curvy Butt to brush it out every night in the tent as we recount the previous days stage. Weeeee, that sounds like a fun time! Is it me or is this race starting to sound more like "Brokeback Mountain"?

Mark: "I missed you"
Craig: "I missed you too. Could you brush my hair for me?"
Mark: "Love to!"

*If that didn't send a shudder down your spine, I don't know what will.*

Take your last gander kids at my lovely locks, cause it's coming off. Send your e-mail requests ladies (and gentle men too, if that's your thing) and I'll envelope a small handful of hair and send it out to you, forever yours to smell and touch. Lucky you!

More on the Fortune race

May as well been riding this gear ratio.

It's my blog and I'll write whatever the G-d damn I want to write . . . you've got the control there in your hands buddy. If you don't like clicky, clicky away.

Tad aggressive? Sorry, sorry. I guess that I am still reeling in the hurt and shame of that race and haven't gotten it out of my system yet. Where's Dr. Phil when you need him ? (That guy is a total tool by the way - wouldn't let him come 50 metres of me with his slackjaw advice).

I think I finished third last out of 15 riders. Phooey! Glad that I had King with me pretty much for the entire race and it was fun to suffer together . . . but I'm thinking that I suffered more - no matter he says!

There were times during the race when I thought I was going to snap the bars right off from the stem because I was pulling and pushing so hard. There were times when I came to almost a dead stop in my forward motion because I didn't have enough momentum and strength in the legs to turn over the 32:18 and power myself over some of the steep, technical sections. No places to recover, sharp, steep uphill climbs with all kinds of rocky, rooty terrain just beat me down.

32:18 (for those of you saying to yourself, "That's not even a 2:1 ratio. What's he bellyaching about?" - listen dipshit, 32:18 on a 29'er is pretty much bang on 32:16 on a 26". And besides, gear ratio ain't 'where it's at!' Gear inches are a more accurate measure. Click, clicky for the Vassago gear inch calculator.

During the OMBA ride I did last night, I ran 32:22T (which is pretty near damn perfect for anything and everything out in KL), I got to wondering if that would have been a wiser gear choice to race at Fortune. And I think it would have been. I would definitely have been spit right out the back at the start of the race while on the flats and would have had to spin like a mad man each lap in that particular section. But, then I would have been way, way more efficient in every other section of the course and wouldn't have wasted so much energy heaving and ho'ing on the bars & pedals.

I can't make the next Fortune race, which is the day before I leave for the BC Bike Race, so will have to wait until mid-July to test my hypothesis.

Bicycles for Humanity

This weekend is Westfest and I'll be heading down to it around 2pm to volunteer some time at the Bicycles for Humanity tent. I found out about Bicycles for Humanity a while back and this has been the first chance that I've had to get involved.

For those of you who haven't heard about Bicycles for Humanity, here you go . . .

Bicycles for Humanity is a grassroots organization and it is growing globally in many wild and wonderful ways. Individuals and community groups everywhere are establishing bike collections and sending containers to Africa to support health workers, women and entire communities with mobility.

If you've got some time this weekend, head down to Westfest to enjoy some fine eats and good music, and take a minute to check out what Bicycles for Humanity is all about.
Cheers.

Fortune Sunset Series Race #2

Three words describe my race . . . . I SUCKED ASS.

Don't know what I was thinking taking the single speed. Well, that's not fair. There was nothing wrong with the single speed - it was more 'operator error' or 'operator inability to operate'.

Here's where I figure I went wrong:

1. decided to get out of bed yesterday
2. decided to race the SS
3. mounted the Nevegals, figuring it was going to be wet and slick
4. ran way too steep of a gear 32:18
5. went out too hard in my warm up
   

I fought with the gearing for the entire race (four laps). I just couldn't seem to get on top of the gear in the technical tight stuff. It was a constant push and pull on the bars and mashing the pedals with all my might just to keep it going. No flow, no mo. When I wasn't in the single track I was climbing. The only place to recover was at the bottom at the start/finish, which is pretty flat - however, I had to spin like crazy not to lose too much time.

A tough workout was scheduled for mid-week, and boy-o-boy did I get one. I really wish that I had my heart rate monitor on for that one. Ahh well, you live and learn, and despite doing very poorly, I still had fun.

Rack-cident

I show up to the Fortune race last night (more on that later today or tomorrow - small glimpse: it was a sufferfest and I am very stoooopid - Fortune is not single speed friendly!) and I'm standing in line to register and I see the Vegan Vagabond. Tanya is always in a good mood and cheerful - last night she looked downright depressed and in a foul mood.
Apparently she had an "rack-cident" with her new bike.

Yep, I said "rack-cident". Put two and two together kids: rack + accident. D'uh.

Apparently Einstein, while visiting her local library, drove into a low overhanging dealie. Now I've heard of people of doing the very same thing, and I am not naming names here, but what I've always heard happening is the bike tray getting wrecked.

Unfortunately, her bike tray was either very strong or her fork was very weak. End result, she managed to sheer off her dropouts off the fork. D'oh! Did I forget to mention that it's her new fork, attached to her new bike (less than a month old)!?! D'oh!

Tanya, feeling a little blue, holding on to her two new pieces of fork.

And the moral of this story . . . . actually there are two . . . . .

One, don't ever go to the library. Reading is for suckers.

Two, dummy should have read the warning sign saying that there was a low overhang.

Upside for Tanya yesterday: she kicked ass in her race and smoked everyone. Whoot!

Note to make Tanya and every other stupid idiot who has had a 'rack-cident': I've done the same thing too! And I still stand by never going to the library.

Jerseys

The above ad can be found in the Spring issue of Outdoors Ottawa Magazine (clicky, clicky for the electronic version). Inside you'll find this ad of Axis Gear, who is a sponsor of Big Ring Racing. Curvy Butt spent a tonne of time working on them, and if I do say so myself, they look awesome. However, we still has not received our jerseys and we've already had some races and events that we've done anonymous. 24 Hrs of Summer Solstice is just around the corner and The BC Bike Race is in seventeen days - I hope that they are here in time!

Hey Coco & Curvy Butt . . . . how about lighting a fire under someone?!

Paul's Enduro IMBA Epic Weekend

The Peterborough Cycling Club and the Bloomfield Bicycle Club and the International Mountain Bike Association and the Ganaraska Forest invite you to join us for a most excellent mountain bike Celebration of the Paul's Dirty course being named an IMBA EPIC.

Important points you need to know ...

• it's FREE
• it's FUN
• there's camping for ALL
• it's the kickin'est singletrack in these here parts!

Drop us an R.S.V.P if you have a mind to join us (so we can figure out what kind of project we're gonna attempt on the WORK portion of the day) and we'll look forward to seeing you all on July 12 & 13, 2008, at the Ganaraska Forest Centre!

Flying Naked Ladies With Bikes

I've been meaning to put some photos of my newest tattoo since April, when I got it for my birthday (I will accept belated cards, presents or sums of money from any of you wanting to send me something for my birthday as it was back in March).

My tattoo is an image from a famous poster that French artist G. Massias painted in 1895 to publicize a new bicycle -- the Cycle Gladiator. Started in Paris in 1891 by Alexandre Darracq (an eccentric, who would later become famous for manufacturing automobiles), Gladiator was one of the dozens of bicycle companies that saturated the market when the cycling craze boomed. The Golden Age of cycling reached its pinnacle in 1895—and that same year printer G. Massias unveiled one of the great Parisian advertising posters. Only four of these original posters exist today.

All of the work that I have on me, up until this last piece, has had significant and important personal meaning. I wanted something a little more fun and something that I wanted just because I liked it.

Originally, the poster was designed to entice people to buy Gladiators bikes - sex sells! I also choose the image, not because I too am sexy, but it reminded me of a nymph or angel. And on my back, maybe she'll help me go faster when I ride and keep an eye out for me. Corny? Maybe, but it's my tatoo and my back . . . . so go pound rocks.

Julie's work can be seen here at New Moon.

Sat Gat Ride

Chrissie and Jacks dropped me off at P7 Saturday morning and headed off for a walk in the woods while I got ready to roll with Tanya and Kari.
Plan was a ride up to the fire tower, a repeat of the 40, over to Fortune for a lap or two, then to Gameline.
It was hot and muggy yesterday. Ottawa has such extreme temperatures - super duper cold in the winter and stifling, hot and humid in the summer.

The ride yesterday was great up until the first hour, when I flatted coming down a rocky section. I've been playing around with the air pressure in my rear tire - guess I went too low. Got the tube changed out, only to find a hole in it. D'oh! Patched the original tube, tried filling it with my air cartridge - pssssssssssst! Lost all the air, didn't seal at the adapter. Stupid adapter. Luckily Tanya had a pump. D'oh! Wouldn't work for me.

While I was swearing and trying to get the flat changed and wiggling my bum so that the mosquitoes wouldn't bite me, Tanya snapped this wicked shot of a really cool beetle.
Anyone know what kind it is?

To the rescue . . . Hannah came around the corner, just as I was about to toss everything into the woods and start walking home. Luckily she had a pump and I was able to get the bike moving again. Thanks again Hannah!

Curvy Bum was out of town this weekend doing the Rideau Lakes Tour. So I got to ride with two curvier bums instead.

Fire Tower

Dooooooooooood!

Met this fella and his buddy walking up the 40 looking to get some gnarly air on their dirt surfers. I don't think he was into it for the fitness - check out the smoke in his hand.
He was a pretty nice guy though and told us to check out this site.

Nice bog. Slimmy green'ness.
Scientists and biologists are saying that this is an ideal year for blackflies and mosquitoes. You don't have to stop long on the trail to find that out!

Besides having three flats, it was a good ride. Almost a great ride, up until I flatted just before getting to the Champlain Bridge, which I had to walk the whole way home from. Crippity crap.

Do as I say!

I meant to get this up Thursday night after the ride . . . . however, what I do lately is not dictated by me. I'd much rather dictate what I do. I would like to be a dictator. Not a mean one wielding potatoes or anything like that, cause that's just not me.

Potato for you?! No potato!

Like I said, when was it? my last post . . . . ? Yes, I took the Jabber (which, I know, have not yet done a proper 'coming out' presentation for - coming out of what?!) to KL Thursday night for the OMBA ride.

Ain't she purdy and all shiny? I had just waxed her before I took this picture - yes, I wax my bikes. Notice, no headbadge! Shocking. I've become anonymous.
I hope someone down in Maryland is seeing this? We need something special for The Burt (for those of you who don't know why I am calling it 'The Burt', be patient little ones . . . . all will be revealed), don't we Kris and Misty? Something firey and gold! Whoot!

Put a big ass 22T Surly cog on and I was ready to go. Those with good eyes will notice the shitty, rusty chain . . . . yep, not like me at all. The chain that I was using for the 18T wouldn't work for the larger cog, so I had to recycle an old chain. Some Progold lube cleaned it right up! In this gear combo I could ride everything with ease. It was nice to be able to spin up things and not have to focus on getting on top of the gear to clear obstacles. I also ran my 29'er Kenda Nevegals with low air pressure, which acted as some nice suspension and hooked up on everything, despite the wet, greasy conditions on the rocks and roots.

The Jabberwocky handled everything I rode incredibly well. It feels very balanced and with a slightly slacker headtube angle than the Niner, it flows over the bumpy stuff with ease. I was impressed with how it handles and as the ride went on, I became more and more comfortable and confident on it. More to come.

John B. coming off Camel Hump . . . . or is it Camel Toe?!
Ewwww . . . that just doesn't sound right.

Mike and Lenny.
I even donned my baggies to fit in with the free riders. If I had worn my race-boy shorts, they might laugh and taunt me, then I would cry. Dictators don't cry.

* big "Hello" to reader(s) in Scotsdale, Arizona looking for the meaning of life!

Cheers!

OMBA ride

Last night the Vegan Vagabond, Curvy Butt and myself made our way into the Gats for a little hill training. Hit the #40 a few times. Anyone know the 40? It's got a few steep pitches to it. I took the single speed, as my rear wheel on the Niner is being rebuilt by the boys at the Moose. The Jabberwocky climbs real nice (as nice as climbing can be stuck in one gear!) . . . . front wheel did not want to leave the ground. I get a very centered feeling while riding this bike. More on it later.

We then headed over to Fortune to get a lap or so in before getting me back in town on time. Ran into Steve and Joey there, who I bet were training for their tag coming up in a few weeks. It was a wee bit slippery and muddy last night, but still a lot of fun. Too much air pressure in the tires to get a feeling of what technical terrain the Jabber can handle.

I'll get a better idea tonight. I'm going to head out to Kanata and hook up with the OMBA ride. I've only been out to one ride with them over the past year. Large numbers and frequent stops don't gel with the training program. One night won't kill me though and it'll be nice to test out the Vassago on all the rocks and roots with the right air pressure. I also received today a 22T cog to try out. Running a 2:1 gear ratio out in KL is do-able, but ain't purdy! Will post up some pictures later.

Mt St. Marie - Part II

Sunday morning started without rain falling on us. It would however, rain on us later in the day. We left Fritz's chalet and began a steep climb right out of the chute to the base of the ski hill. Once there we climbed some more, another steep pitch, which lead us to another climb. And so on.

Fritz got attacked by a gander who was trying to protect his gosling. Fortunately for the goose, he had heard the rumors of how Fritz tears apart hamburgers two at a time and waddled away feeling lucky that he didn't suffer the same consequences.

Top of a climb, early morning. Clouds and mist hung low on the mountains.

Paceline

Waterfall

Damn it.

Damn from above

We biked so hard and got so dehydrated that we shrank in size to the size of the Keebler Elves.

Two days of stats:
Day 1: 3178 feet, 77.12km, 3:44 actual ride time, 20.6 kph average, max speed of 65kph.

Day 2: 5,338 feet, 77.39 km, 3:29 actual ride time, 22.1 kph average speed, 63.9 kph max speed.

* stolen from Fritz's blog on big ring racing. More stats there (clicky, clicky).